And I'm backkkk

After a year and a half break (probably much, much longer), I've decided to come back to my blog.  I've missed it.

I did remove almost all pictures and want to keep my family protected from the evils of the Internet, so no real names or anything still.

A LOT has changed in my life and I'm super excited for this next chapter in my life.

I'm ready!

I'm Sick. The End.

OH and I am sick. :(

Cough, sinusitis, asthma - all rolled up in a big, nasty, hairy ball inside of me wrecking havoc on what should be my life.

Not to mention what this horrendous cough is doing to my Mommy Bladder. Enough said.

More bitching... that's all I do.

There is a saying, "there is ordering badly and then there is not ordering at all". I think I always order BADLY. But at least I order. Right now I think nothing is really "right".

My job is a mess... in 2 months time, my boss (whom I loved) was demoted, then 4 weeks later was fired, then 4 weeks later our company was acquired and tons of changes. Now it's a mess and I'm not happy at all there. I am actively looking. I want to move but don't know how to go about getting it done. I want to move some place fabulous.... like New York City or something uber cool like that. I just don't know how to achieve it. I also want a major job change - something radical. How does one do that?!?

My marriage is just blah - it's been the same thing for 2 years and I'm over thinking about it and worrying about it. It's a LOT of work to keep working on it and not ever knowing where it's going.

My grandparents (LOVE THEM) but they are driving me batty. I love them and am so thankful that I still have them in life at the age of 40. But wowza, she calls me daily to tell me what ails her (they are numerous) and goes into detail and then goes heads first into what's going on with my grandpa. With more details.

Oh and I need to LOSE. WEIGHT. Seriously, people. It's sick. I'm so far gone, I have to make a serious change. SERIOUS.

So, it's all crap but I have to find the good. I can't sit around and bitch all the time. I need to start picturing me achieving success and seeing myself making major changes and then doing it. It's all in the power of positive thinking. I have to make it happen or I will forever be sitting here bitching about how it never did. I have to formulate a plan and get some real energy behind it.

More to come...

Bah Humbug

I have caught a case of severe bah humbug's. I think it is because I am much shorter on cash this year, than any other. It's depressing. I have to keep reminding myself that it's not about what you give it's about who you are with. But I have to say it over and over and even I'm getting tired of hearing it.

My job has been another source of stress for me, I have loved my job since I started it almost 3 years ago. Then about 2 months ago, all hell broke loose. My boss was first demoted beginning of Nov, then a month later, fired. It has caused a lot of havoc and uncertainty. It's also been a time of a lot of change in a short span. it's a lot to take in. That has not helped.

My husband and I are still not stable and I am back to square one - questioning if I should stay in a marriage that is so unstable and rocky. I need to face my fears and stand on my own to feet and just cut the ties. That is what my head says. My heart is scared.

I'm almost done with school. That is the really great thing. I have 6 classes left, I will be done by June 2011. I am so excited. After I finish, I am seriously contemplating just continuing on with my same school and getting my Masters, while I have momentum. Then I can truly say I am done.

Just so many things on my mind right now and I needed a place to just vent and get it out there. One of my 2011 goals is write a lot more often and get back into my blog. It's 3 years old and I have neglected it for about a year. I do read all the blogs I follow though, I read them from my phone, I just don't comment very much. I hope every one's holiday's are treating them well and everyone is ending 2010 with a bang!

A Cool Giveaway!

The gals over at Hillbilly Chicks is giving away an awesome cookbook by Gooseberry Patch. Check out their site and sign up for the giveaway here.

Settling In

I am pretty happy in our new place. It's so quite and just the perfect size for my daughter and I. My (almost) 17 yo son pretty much stays with his brother in our hometown (about 20 minutes away). I can say about 75% of the boxes are put away and organized... but we still have some work to do.



The topic of discuss in these here parts (Iowa) is FLOODING. I am in no danger whatsoever but a few of my friends have had some issues.... one it looks like an earthquake hit her backyard - half her yard sank about 5 feet. The other friend has a major river that is rising and is about 2 houses away from his.

On the Move AGAIN

So I am moving. Again. I've been in our beautiful, wonderful townhome a year. However my marriage just couldn't make it. So in lieu of not being able to afford this place myself, my daughter and I are moving. Again. (Oh, I said that already...) We have a pool here, huge back yard that's like a park, 2 play grounds and a sand volley ball court and kids for my daughter to play with. And we are moving to another, smaller townhome...which I wanted it to be smaller, the place we are in is way to big for just her and I, so that's good, but we have no amenities, it's in a beautiful townhome community and I'm excited for the house itself, just not leaving all the "stuff" this one has. I am rambling and not forming coherent sentences at all.

So I will end with, I want to marry Neil from SYTYCD, yes he's half my age and I could probably technically be his mother, but I don't care, I love him. ROAR.